ch.255 hmm..

hmm.. i still miss my grandm alot.

the glue is gone.. we tried to hold on but things r starting to fall apart.

i m so exhausted with the church activities.. i had a thought of having a break. serving God is exhausting sometime.. but i know i shdn't stop serving.

ch.254 I am a 哲學家.

分析：您的性格類型是「INFP」( 哲學家 )

理想主義者，忠於自己的價值觀及自己所重視的人。外在的生活與內在的價值觀配合，有好奇心，很快看到事情的可能與否，能夠加速對理念的實踐。試圖瞭解別人、協助別人發展潛能。適應力強，有彈性；如果和他們的 價值觀沒有牴觸，往往能包容他人。 INFP把內在的和諧視為高於其他一切。他們敏感、理想化、忠誠，對於個人價值具有一種強烈的榮譽感。他們個人信仰堅定，有為自認為有價值的事業獻身的精神。 INFP型的人對於已知事物之外的可能性很感興趣，精力集 中於他們的夢想和想像。他們思維開闊、有好奇心和洞察力，常常具有出色的長遠眼光。在日常事務中，他們通常靈活多變、具有忍耐力和適應性，但是他們非常堅定地對待內心的忠誠，為自己設定了事實上幾乎是不可能 的標準。 INFP型的人具有許多使他們忙碌的理想和忠誠。他們十分堅定地完成自己所選擇的事情，他們往往承擔得太多，但不管怎樣總要完成每件事。雖然對外部世界他們顯得冷淡緘默，但INFP型的人很關心內在。他們富 有同情心、理解力，對於別人的情感很敏感。除了他們的價值觀受到威脅外，他們總是避免衝突，沒有興趣強迫或支配別人。INFP型的人常常喜歡通過書寫而不是口頭來表達自己的感情。當INFP型的人勸說別人相信他們的 想法的重要性時，可能是最有說服力的。 INFP很少顯露強烈的感情，常常顯得沉默而冷靜。然而，一旦他們與你認識了，就會變得熱情友好，但往往會避免浮淺的交往。他們珍視那些花費時間去思考目標與價值的人。

您適合的領域有：創作性、藝術類、教育研究、諮詢類等

您適合的職業有：


心理學家
心理輔導和咨詢人員
人力資源管理
翻譯
大學教師（人文學科）
社會工作者
圖書管理員
服裝設計師
編輯
網站設計師
團隊建設顧問
藝術指導
記者
口筆譯人員
娛樂業人士
建築師
社科類研究人員
教育顧問
各類藝術家
插圖畫家
詩人
小說家

http://8word.net/test/mbti/test.htm

ch.253 back on track?

seems like this chapter is towards the end.

slept alot on thursday afternoon. very tired. havn't slept like a baby for 1 month. that afternoon... was a relief. everyone of my family were so tired for the past 1 month.

went to grandma's church today and sang a song to the congregation. The song was "All the way my Saviour leads me". auntie sang melody, i did the harmony, uncle 2played the piano and uncle 3 played the guitar. I think grandma n grandma would be very proud of us. had lunch n dinner with the chruch people. They r very nice people indeed, no wonder my grandma loves this chruch so much.

hope that i can dream of my grandma tonight.

waiting for another exciting chapter to begin.

ch. 252 I miss my grandma

My grandma passed away on the 28th. She went into the hospital on the 9th, a total of 19days. i was there. n i thank God for such amazing perfect timing for me to stay with her.

i miss her alot.

today's her memorial serice. i m writting up my sharing right now.

i miss her so much. my lovely mama.

ch.251 tui

i m so "tui" today. slept the whole day. didn't wanna do anything. NOTHING. super lazy. well, i actually did some freelance this morning but then i spend the whole afternoon sleeping. I am feeling realyl crappy right now about this waste of time that happened.

lots to do ar. really.

i shd stop working on my bed.

ch.250 what's going on

You r with me. i know that. I m actually getting to know You more and willing to open my heart n truly know You more and let You use me. But o come on, once i've made my decision, so many things happened. come on. come on G. test on faith? ok, fine. just pls guide me to go thru all these along with your teachings. I duno how to survive without u and I m not kidding. Wht's more coming? pls let me hv the wisdom n EQ to handle everything u prepared for me la. .. dun give me a heart attack anymore pls.

it's may already. so many things happened. omg.

gotta keep prayingprayinprayin n praying. nothign can be done without U, G.

short listing:
grandma's on wheelchair.
nov.
job?
place to stay?
money
relatives

ch.249 HCIKFS - part 3

i cannot believe how many times i went to wc today just for getting the shit out of me. it felt great! i think this wk is definitely a detox week for me.haha..

working on my omp website. eventho the server company has given me straight directions, but still seem to be kinda hard to get it working. haha. but it's great! definitely a good learning process! never really gotta chance to sit down n read so much stuff on how to build a website n online marketing related articles. Also reading Harvard business journal as well, thanks to Lam.

dad's surgery next tues and i m so thankful for this. got a placement within a wk! God is great. I praise Him wiht all my heart and wanna see what's next. anything we could do for HIm for all these miracles? definitely a good testimony already.

the weather is so great the past few days and i could only be thankful for everything.

i m off the hook with ETMS, got 'enuf" money to work on my omp project, got time to spend with my family, n great environment to live in. even got a car to drive now! haha.

How could i keep from singing your praise?

ch.248 How can i keep from singing - part 2

my dad is diagnosed with cancer.

On the day..
when i moved back to stay with him
when i can spend more time to be with my family when they needed me the most.

How can i keep from singing your praise, Lord.

ch.247 How can I keep from singing

----------------------------------
This is a P&W song that i really love: "How can i keep from singing"
There is an endless song
Echoes in my soul
I hear the music ring

And though the storms may come
I am holding on
To the rock I cling

How can I keep from singing Your praise
How can I ever say enough
How amazing is Your love
How can I keep from shouting Your name
I know I am loved by the King
And it makes my heart want to sing

I will lift my eyes
In the darkest night
For I know my Savior lives

And I will walk with You
Knowing You'll see me through
And sing the songs You give

I can sing in the troubled times
Sing when I win
I can sing when I lose my step
And fall down again
I can sing 'cause You pick me up
Sing 'cause You're there
I can sing 'cause You hear me, Lord
When I call to You in prayer
I can sing with my last breath
Sing for I know
That I'll sing with the angels
And the saints around the throne

_______________________________________________

Back from the "Touch Heaven Change Earth" camp from Breakthrough just now, it was good. Time passed very fast and i had 2 nights of very good sleep. I am no longer the teenager who wouldn't go to sleep when we got to a camp, I went to bed before 12 both nights. :) And it was good. Felt very energetic. The speaker, rev. dr. victor yap, he was good. The workshops were good reminder of how to be a true follower of Christ. keep reminding myself and fellow belivers.

Last thurs (April 7,09) was my last day at ETMS. Almost four years of work partnership has put to a full stop. I am officially a free. My plans are:
1) design PM - with sum? have to talk to him.
2) OMP- thank G for rachel as my partner. I need lots of discipline for this as i do not want to regret with this adventure of mine.
3) Help out my dad, in all sorts of ways.
4) Exercise everyday - for my digestion sake, which is a good motivation as i do not wanna die becoz i m full of shit at the age of 70.
5) Get my demo done and send to backstage.
6) Learn japanese
7) really put time on learning music theory -so that i can be a good worship leader.

Just found that T has moved back to HK as well n is expecting a baby. ha. i m abit angry. i m. but luckily just for a few seconds. pray that he will accept G n hv angels around him.

The hutchison family is moving back to Derby and i m going to miss them alot. Had a good talk with Helen last night and their strong faith on G is something that made me stand in awe. Their lives told me how amazing G is and how important it is to hv faith on G.

i hv so many things inside my room right now. bascially all the things i had when i was living at PE. things that fitted in 3 rooms now i hv to find ways to fit into my 80 sq ft room. Shdn't be too hard, just that i have to be firm on throwing away unnecessary items.

ch.246 march already

just got back from Lam's wedding tonite. i saw a cute guy, but i think he's not available. met lots of my bro's classmates.. some r actually cute.. but only 1 is single. haha. sad. oo. just taled to lam .. can't believe he's online... *O*.. n that guys' name is john.

very tired these days.

mom left today. back to hk on thurs nite to spend the day with her. Had family noodle at grandma's. o i miss grandma so much. the dinner was great. jelly was brought to grandma's place also n everyone loved her.

o, actaully met anny,kevin, eddie n michael today at lam's wedding. that's quite amazing. Havn't seen them for years.. eddie is divourced for 2 yrs already... time flies.. well, i m turning to 30 soon, i guess time is running fast..

got so many things to do but totally in procrastination mode. T.O.T.A.L.L.Y.
i duno y i m so lack of passion to do everything.

my life.. i needa change it.

ch.245 it's FEB already!! feb 14 tmmr btw..

ok, so i hvnt' blogged for awhile. i guess i m used to my life style in gz.. which is:
1. off work at 6/7pm.. lately, sometimes 830
2. got to the wet market to buy the following --> zuccini, tomato, corn, mushroom
these r seriously the only thigns i buy.. i duno wht else to cook coz i usually cook all those together in a pot with noodle. ppl know this did commented that i m back to uni days. ha.
3. watch "chu-kwong-bo-hey" at 930pm... n while watching it, work on my holahoop. yes i m officially a c9. but come on, the show is good and man, the holahoop did a mazing work!! i worked on it for over 30 mins... i m quite din. haha
4. cleaning up.. face, shower, whtever..
5. go online on my bed. o, this is like the dream situation for me.... i always wanted to go online on bed. hah.. but for me, this is becoz i could ONLY go online on bed in gz..
6. read
7. sleep.

ya. that's my schedule in gz.. i do go out for dinner someitmes.. but becoz of that "puking" experience once, i m abit reluctant to go out to eat. i prefer eating things that i cook without oil.. yes.. no oil pls. i m scared of it.

anyway, i had my first "dig-the-sand" on feb 11st, last wed, at a chinese massage place. it's not bad. the doc said it's for detox, help sleeping disorder and get rid of the wetness inside me. well, duno if it's mental delusion or whtever, i do feel better after the "gwart sa". however, my back is all red now, glad that it's not purple, just abit red. i think i'll do it again. it's a good experience.

work. ha. well, work is just unbelivable. i look forward to work for someone else. working on my resume... hvnt' send out any yet tho. will do soon. it's great to meet new frds, such as the supplier, mr. He, o, i think he likes me.. he did asked me out today. (vday) but i tend to just meet up with him n said i needa go back to hk (but i m still at gz now). anyway, chris sms me about "trip". wa. shd i go? i dun think so eh? first of all, i m oging back to toronto in sept, i dun hv money! 2ndly, i m not taht into him n he's not that into me.. why bother?? come on. wake up!!

chicpet is going on. funny how "straight forward" kylie is and it's pissing me n rachel off. anyway, hope that we could do better int he new inventory. really hv to spend on time on it.

i m in love with jelly, my bro's toy poddle. She is such a cutie. i think she loves me too. i stayed over last wknd at their place n the little thing climbed up to my bed n just sat there n played with me.. jacquie said she's not as stable with others.. o i just love jelly.

OO, n i finished my first 10km run last sunday!! time is 1 hr!! i m soooo proud of myself! woke up at 4am, foudn that all the ppl in the mtr are geared up for the run. quite an amazing feeling. everyone's heading to the same goal. i was in the 2nd run, which started at 6am. it's an amazing feeling to run wiht sooo many ppl. n also runnign from dark till dawn. that is just crazily beautiful!! the residences along the bridge had banners of "add oil" n i figures that was just amazing. that really helped me to push myself more. i ran like crazy from 7km - 8km. skipped every person n just kept running n running. i felt good tho.

mom's comign tmmr and we'll hv dinner witht he Louey's at nite. Gigi's wedding on the 28th and i m so happy for her. she's 38, groom is 34? 32? i duno. aynway, i m happy for my dear cousin. speaking of cousin, my dearest cousin Chris, just finished his exams. i m so proud of him eventho i m not around him. i think i love him as much as i love myself.

the church joint worship is comignup in march. i m SOOO EXCIteD!!! yay! i pray for G to use us. sing n priase as if we were in heaven!!! :D i do wish solomon could join us for the worship. he is a great muscisian indeed..

lately, i m hving lots of dreams about guys.. guys that i dun really like. haha.. how crazy.. actually, it's guys that i know.. but i also know that i won't like them.. those type of guys.. eg. gallent. i actually dreamt about him. omg.. quite horrible.

i bought abottleof 2003 bordeaux chateau du fontenille tonight at Carefour. yes, carefour. it is on crazy sales!! most of the things r only for rmb 1!! i finsihed 1/3 of the bottle already. hehe..

so many things happened that i wanna record them... but i think i m abit drunk for now. haha.

ch.244 tung-heung

doc sam came to the office today. i was so happy. i felt like my family has came to visit me... a 'tung heung" has come and rescue me from the daily familiar yet different people. listening to his chin-glish. i felt so happy. his fast pace of saying things, the cantonese without the gz tone. so, what a happy day for me.

i never realized that i miss hk so much... not after today. talking and working with the 3.. i feel i m going down. different culture, different mentality. not like i dun wanna be frds.. but sometimes, just the little things, it's hard.

anyway, bought an amazing Victorinox jacket today. it was love at first sight. saw it. love it. went to the bank for cash. bought it. haha.. the material and the detail of the jacket totally impressed me. it was a gd deal also. so happy with this!

needa get to sleep early n wake up early. o, n i feel abit lor-lor-luen without chris calling. crap.

ch.243 Dec 08 + beginning of 09

What a great time in dec.
so many things happened.

xmas - 25th : DOXA celebration - amazing choir (30 ppl), great dessert, went to langham hotel with auntie, fay fay and jackie. slept over at jackie's, got bite by siu fu.

26th : boxing day dinner at Jan Fong's. turkey dinner, pictionary, apple crumble, hazel nute torte, serbert, icecream, duck breast, crab cakes and ice wine. :)

27th: lunch at knutsford, spanish bass.. not too good... joy ride to fay-ngor-shan and wing-lung bay with grandma and sam suk and sum. fringe club with chris.. fun music!

28th: church - played with jelly, bought magazines, dinner with fam at a shunde restarurant.

29-3 (noon) : at GZ
31st: worked till 8pm.. went back home n cooked myself some zucinni~ (yum) bought dvds n watched a documentary by a brit called the failure of my sexual history.. somethign liek that.. quite funny acatully. n then got a called by Mir to say happy new yr. n then head to bed to go online. gary told me he proposed n then agnes emailed me the same news. amazing start for my new year!! very very happy for them.

1st: stayed in gz coz hv to work on the 2nd. had a big breakfast = Timmies' coffee (so good) + tomata + french bread. Then walked aroudn my neighbourhood, went to jusco for grocery. Jason called n had dinner with him at sheung-ha-gau.. and then walked along n all the way to the river side. very tiring but gd time spend to know more about gz.

2nd: got sick in the afternoon. quite badly..n so stayed over night n back to hk on the 3rd.

3rd: back to hk by 3/4pm. out to tst/ jordan with mir to buy shoes n cny clothes for the twins. quite sick at the end and so got back home at 1030pm. got msg from Chris. and my lovely dad gave me the best pill - anti-histamine and i had a wonderful deep sleep... till 1pm. haha

4th: so didn't go to chruch and ended up went to mk n grandma's place to drop off the calendar. Went to Island ECC 5pm service instead, not bad. funny how the sermon was similar to the one i heard before at EEC.. "easier to say : u r healed? or your sin is forgiven." anyway, glad that i went. have always watned to go visit other churches. ECC got many ppl and the crhuch is blessed with allt he missions that they r doing. Nite out with Chris at backstage. enjoyed the performance by ted lo, eugene pau, angelita li and others. amazing performance! very happy that i chose to go there. dun felt sick anymore.

5th.... feeling sick again. haha.. i guess it's becoz i m back to gz to work. lolz.. never got cured. O, Amy Yam's boy was born yesterday!! so excited but she's not coz she said the baby look slike her husband. whahaa... anyway, will visit her on the 17th. haha

ch.242 Moving again

today is the packing day for me. moving out of PE to TP or may be it's GZ.

pastor D & Joanne came n get the sofa, the bed and other stuff. Solomon & Alex came n got the tv and the tv table. now i m cleaning up stuff that i dun need and throwing stuff away.

feelin a bit low for now as i feel qutie alone doin all these. always wanted to have someone here with me. i'd hv to admit i m not that strong.

i bought egg tarts for solo n alex. m i really too nice to ppl? i take care of ppl and think for them too much without caring for myself. it's supposed to be a good thing right? at this down moment of my life, i really need to depend on G. listen to my pray during my distress. God is here with me and i m not alone. all these sadness n loneliness r from the other side. o, i suddenly feel alot better now. wow, this is amazing. i m just thinking it out loud and i m expereincing the change inside me now.

Pray for the india ppl, the world is in its end? G, let me know what i shd do for u at this time, during my days on earth. As i want to fulfill my purpose on earth for U. really. the P&W idea, pls teach me how to do it. also, how to deal with my duties on earth.

ch. 241 6 months

was told that i was only given 6 months to try out in GZ.
hmm... relief? relax? not, none of these two.
had lunch with Kevin of SZ today. He said it took him 1 yr to really get himself to feel better in SZ. it was a good time spend today for lunch. gotta know more ppl and he's kinda cute. haha.
lots to do tmmr n the coming wk.
can't believe the client picked those 2 names but what could be done?

don't give up.

"it's a very hard feeling to be questioned..." - s+e

moving out of PE to dad's place this sunday. sat will be the pick up days by everybody. solomon & alexander. lolz. that's really quite funny. pastor D and wife, pauline and raymond. that's great. i m glad the things i hv ppl found them useful.

will be back to hk this friday.. hopefully the time will be well spent there.

ch.240 tear of joy

went to Nick Vujicic's event tonite. tears kept coming out of my eyes from the beginning til the end.

still praying for mir and jacquie. I m happy for jacquie tho, she is willing to know more. i have to keep praying for her.

also, reivial hk. the idea of P&W is more confirmed. How to do? still need more prayers. dear G, i wanna do somethign for u,pls let me know.

ch.239 friday night

no worship team practice. without notice. acatully, noticed at 8pm. kinda piss at this unorganize schedule. i dun work around his schedule.
missed charron's husband's bday party. missed the chance ot meet new friends. due to the unorganization of the highsch kid.
went jogging instead. ran like crazy and sweat like crazy. walked from tst to home afterward. had caramel latte on the way home.. felt good. i dun even feel tired at all. weird

went to shunde for the project today. 1 client 1 day. wht a day.

finally gave ken the undies. haha.. the colors r sooo baby.. gd that he loves them. haha.. o, n met his bf. funny.

ch.238 not happy

not happy with boss' way of handling things.

force a client to take thigns that they rejected?
wht the?

ch.237 cultural SHOCK!

had the gz team over for hot pot tonite. OMG, they used sooo much oil. everything is oil to them.
1) the sauces: 3 out of 3 - oil based. (!!!!) a) oil with garlic b) oil with hot pepper 3) oil with green pepper and soy sauce
2) the soup: they acatully boil oil and garlic and ginger first n then pour in the soup mix and water. The amount of oil wasn't tiny. i was shocked!
3) continue addition of pure oil into their bowl while eating. (!!!!!!)

i m in serisous need of a vege diet and i can't help but feel the growing of my already not so tiny stomach. While i was thinking to have salad at night, this one girl told me "DON"T!" coz the vege in china is so poisoned and dirty. (!!!!) she was like, "Really, DON"T". *O*

the hot pot was not bad, had tons of food. O, finalyl tasted the "Great wall" red wine.. it was bad. really bad. hahaa.. can't believe it. Dora brought it over and we all had some. again, she said i m fatter. haha. o well.

man, this is something funy.

btw, i will get to go watch the no limbs guy this sunday. yay ;)

ch.236 The pursuit of Jesus

sermon today talked about to pursuit Jesus, we have to:
1) Walk in line with God
2) Live without fear
3) Live out the challenges as God will not give u anything u can't handle

Last week, it was about how to do it:
1) be joyful
2) focus on God
3) spread the gospel


i m not too sure what's happening in my life right now. i just know that i am always tired. having homes in both hk and gz, travelling, spending time with friends and family, dealing with clients, dealing with boss, dealing with coworkers, learning i m so not ready for committment of a relationship, learning i m not sharp and still lack so much experience, learning that i need to equip myself and not be lazy, wanna do the hk passion p&w event, chruch's duties, exercising, bad stomach, can't handle the oily food... o.. i know i m not going thru anything that i can't handle as God wont' giv eme any that i can't but im so tired and i want to know how all these things lead me or help me to pursuit Jesus.. i m so tired. mentally and physically.