ch.98 not that bad

went to GZ today... presentation, met the new team, lunch with client and walked around... the place is acatully not that bad..

ch.97 alanis morrisette

i always like the song "ironic" by alanis. just love the lyric coz life is just very ironic all the time. i think the song was out when i was in gr. 9 or 10..

i have started jogging since.. i need to get myself physically tired.
today, i m very very tired... after the moving from yesterday and also a long day of running around doing errands... it's just tiring.. i think im actully experiencing the tireness someone told me before...

n i'll be heading to GZ tmmr... argh.. still need to prep for tmmr's presntation.. :(

-------------------------------------
"Ironic"

An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic... don't you think

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures

Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought
"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic... don't you think

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face

A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic...don't you think
A little too ironic...and, yeah, I really do think...

It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought... it figures

Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out

ch.96 charron's children are soo cute

went to have dinner with charron tonite and her children are so cute. the gal is 2 yrs old and the boy is less than 1. the little gal went crazy tonite, kept doing gymnastic. lol.. she's so funny. And she talked like an adult.. but in ways that i dun really undersatnd.. coz she mumbles. so cute. and the son.. fell asleep when he was drinking milk.. lol!

had a great dinner with charron. haven't seen her for ages and everyone's life is so interesting. i guess i'll see her more often when i got to GZ later on... gonna go to her place for "oak kay fan". hehe..

ch.95 life goes on

life goes on.

everything goes on.

work.. yay, i m manager now.

life goes on.

prayer goes on. will never stop for u.

ch.94 walking through

praying to the Lord for the protection of your heart, your mind and your soul.

praying to the Lord for your family.

praying to the Lord for you.

ch.93 hangs

it just hangs...

day is ok.

nite is n just too long.

The night is just so long...

* may be i shd buy in 0922 now. ha
whtever.
whtever.
whtever.

argh.

it just hangs...

ch.92 still

how come it's still so painful
how come everything is still so vivid
how come i still can't sleep
how come i still dun wanna eat
how come i still can't harden my heart
how come i still can't get things over with
how come crazy things r still happening

YOU won't give me things that i can't handle.. but i really can't do this for too long...

all i can do is to keep praying for him. still...

ch. 91... apparently.. i can write

i've been writing lots of letters lately.. for work and personal.

for work, i acatully got praised by "THE" ppl about my writing skill. i m abit overwhelmed by that as they are "THE" pro.

for personal, i got no response from what I wrote...

but i have to admit that i express better by words than verbal communication. i hope you understand.

btw, someone is calling me "drama queen" now. haha.. coz of all the things happened to me... the two area in life that i tresaure and cherrish the most... that are on the top of the priority list.

i guess.. life is a drama.

ch. 90 understand

yes i understand now.

still love you tho~ :)

ch. 89 pain

it hurts so much.

can't use any words to describe.

i can't breath, i can't sleep, i can't eat and i can't see.

cried as much as i could, till my eyes can't open and my ears can't hear.

i think my heart stopped.

the pain grows bigger and bigger and deeper and deeper everyday.

people say time heals the pain... but my pain is rooted into my heart and it's growing everyday.

i should be mad, i should be angry, but i couldn't. i couldn't.

i love you. i really do love you. we were going to grow old together, we had all the things together. we complement each other. we had good foundation. we experienced all these together. our past doesn't worth a 2nd chance? i m willing to doo all things with you. i've changed. don't leave me.

ch. 88 Compatibility

M i compabtible with T?

i think at the beginning of the relationship, we talked about that, acatully, he talked about that.. he said wht makes the relationship work is to have good foundation and we r compatible. hmm... compatible as in we complete each other... it's not the chessy, goose bump saying.. he meant that he takes care of the external thigns and i take care of the internal.. and that makes a good team and that's compatible in his definition. i somekind agree and so far, things r working well between us because i m better at doign the small things.. i m more attention to details n he is soooo not. is that compatible? i hmm.... i just think that within comptaible, there's also comprimising, undertstanding, tolerating, forgiving, and not too great expectation of the other half... too much expectation leads to too great of disappointment n pain... n yah, i learn not to expect too much from T and everything else is bonus. haha..eg. i will not expect him for any romance and him bringing me out to Sphagetti house is a bonus. wahaha..

ch.87 YIPEE~~

My freind whom i've known since gr. 3 just rang me and told me that SHE IS GETTING MARRIED next yr !!!

i m soooo happy for her. She's one of my best friends that lasted for almost 20 yrs! 20 YEARS! wow. Me and her and three other girls were "the GANG" since gr 3 - gr 6.. and then she immigrated to new zealand and then me to toronto and then other girls to vancouver. We havent' seen each other since gr. 7. and then in this few yrs, allof us went back to HK to work and "the GANG" is back again. It is amazing how we all can enjoy each other's company w/o any stranger-feeling after all these years. And now, this girl, whom is the closest to me among all, is getting married!!! The feeling is amazing.

I duno how we could keep in touch for so many years, when i told my other friends, they were all amazed. Most have lost contact with freinds from HK after they immirgrated. I m really thankful for this relationship~ :)

ch.86 i m old and lost and have no money... can i be a child again?

at this moment, i m still refusing to grow up. so many things i needa take care by myself.. argh... so much better when i could just leave everythign to my mom and dad. ... but apparently, i can't now.
God, pls grant me wisdom for all the decision making, which way I can most glorify you? Please give me some hints...

ch.85 miracle life

i love this stability.

seems like everything's fine now.

I m enjoying this. God is good to us. The more I think about it, the more i think God has performed miracles.

ch.84 O, Happy Day

Tommy 決志 today!

OMG.

OMG.

Praise the LORD!

He came back from San Fran last thurs and today's the first time he came back to church. We had our drama team workshop today and had a good time trying to act. (We'll have X'mas drama at church! a professional HK Theatre actress, who's one of our fellowship members, is holding workshop to teach us, so much fun and blessed~) Anyway, after the workshop, we had our prayer time. I duno why, when it's time for ppl to say out what they wanna pray for, I immediately shout out loud to the ppl, first. i told them that Tommy is starting his job next Tues! everyone's happy for him. and then, since T's cantonese is not that good and so i kept talking (wahhaah.. ) and out of nowhere, i said to the ppl, pls pray for T's learning about God, i talked to him and he said he belived in God but still not too sure. n then, suddenly, this brother, who's actaully devoted himself as a missionary and he's studying theology now, asked T the questions. without hesitation, T said yes, he believes that God resurrected from the dead, that he accepted God as his personal saviour forever. N the brother immediately asked T to pray with him, saying after him, n T said yes. I was speechless. It was totally out of my imagination. I was just asking them to pray for Tommy and out of nowhere, Tommy said yes to the Lord.

I am speechless, Lord. You are truly one amazing, full of blessings, Lord.

Pls lead me and T to live our lives fully for You, Lord.

ch.83 GZ

finally started the Guangzhou project.

Today's my first day to GZ. Went there to interview the big boss of WCL . went there at 8:30am, got there at 10:30am.. n then back home at 6:30pm. What a tiring day. having sorethroat as well... aiya.. from cherry, i think. cherry's my co-worker.. a gal who is actually very similar to me but abit more "think it out loud". Anyway, i m feeling not too gd rite now.. just got back from bday dinner of my aunt, had a gd time = gd food. i hope i dind't make them sick as well. lol. my thinking is very fragmentated rite now coz i think i needa sleep. O, n janet is finally married! saw the pix of her wedding day from grace, seems like it was a very fun filling nite. i m so happy for her. O, n my T is having interview in HK, i pray for and with him about this and hopefully he could get it.

bloggin is fun,i like talking to myself. haha.

ch.82 back to bloggin'

Suddenly felt like bloggin again.

I have changed... so much. I was reading my blogs and I was quite different right now.

I've changed job. Working as AE at a marketing solutions company.
still with T. but so much further away... yet connects with our hearts.
lost weight.. due to uncountable stomach flu.. hk is such a dirty place.
permed my hair ... luckily not like a c9.
having lots of ups n downs... closed myself to myself.

I need to open. please give me courage to open.

What I am doing right now, doesn't feel good.

ch.81 my 1st 26th bday celebration

Date: Mid autumn festival, sept 18, 2005, sunday
Place: my dad's place at lam tsuen
What: BBQ
Weather: partly rainy, not too hot


didn't expect my dad to throw me a bday party tonite. i thought it was just going to be a mid autumn fest family gathering. i was pretty surprised and touched. i really love them. everyone seemed so old tonite..grandma, dad, aunt julie, uncle tim...but not my bro. haha.. he's still stupid looking. anyway.. just that.. i m realizing.. i m getting ollder and ihave more responsiblities to bare and i need to get myself ready.

ch. 80 keep learning

growing up is tough.

so many situations have to face, so many decisions to make.
no more daddy, no more mommy, only you, yourslef alone.

i m glad that i m confuse, if no confusion, i duno wht God has given me. i can't be clear on what i want and see clearly who is really there for me. acatully, everyone's there for me .. so i m very blessed.

life is so much 'crazier' in hk. so MANY ups and downs. so many surprises. so many decisions. or may be it's not about hk, it's about growing up.

how's everyone handling? i m still learning.

ch.79 back to my blog

haven't blogged for ages. i guess it's mainly because of the crazy workload. just dun wanna turn on the computer at home after work.. i guess u guys understand.
well, so here's some update of moi:
1) still with T. haha
yah, can't believe, it's been 7 months already. and i think we r doing better. lots of htings have happened between me n him, actually to me and to him. we both acted as each other's supporter and things r doing pretty well.
2) change of attitude
i dont' want to work in this comany anymore. i finally reallized that i m not a workaholic. after 9 months of non-stop working. i think my limit is reached. the out come is not worth my input.. working for such long hours almost every single day, can't even do my basic, simpliest stuff as a person, ie. go to the bank. this is just unhuman. and yes, i'll quit. the goodness of the creative director cannot overcome the bitterness and crazyness of this work environment. acatully, i m thinking if i m gd for this industry. this is wht i m concern about these days. Those who came back from Tor, whom have met me, all said that i m a workaholic. but nah, i dun think so. i think i can be one, but i dun wanna be one. i need my life back.
3) living with my bro
yah, moved for 3 months already. same area in homantin, pretty close to my grandma. very convenience location acatully. glad to live w/ my bro. he's annoying at times but it's ok, we still worked things out.